Come What May
by It'sGonnaBeTotallyAwesome
Summary: "Your Prince Charming's out there, Dorcas - but it's not me." Dorcas Meadowes always thought she belonged with David Brave ever since they were children. However, that fateful night of rejection brought about Sirius Black, ready to sweep her off her feet.
1. Prince Charming

"_Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens up your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside and mess you up. You build up these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't you own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should just be friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."_

_Neil Gaiman_

**Ch. 1 – Prince Charming**

Dorcas Meadowes still remembered the night her love life both crumbled and ignited in an amount of time that, quite frankly, probably was not healthy. To her credit, she didn't know that her love life was igniting once again, at the time – she was too preoccupied with the crumbling part, and not to mention her annoyance for Sirius Black, who just happened to pop up to save the day. . . .

And now, as she surely stared death in the face, she looked back on her life without a shred of regret, especially when it comes to the likes of Sirius Black.

She struggled with the ropes tying her hands, but of course they were magically bound as well. She glared up at death and would've spit in his face had her mouth not been covered by cloth. The figure looked down at her with almost a pitying smile, as he fingered his wand.

"Come now – this does not have to be difficult," he hissed, "You are pureblood after all. Tell us where they are, and I will allow you to join us."

The cloth around her mouth slithered from her mouth and fell to the ground. She was breathing hard, like she'd just run a marathon, and felt so much hatred in her heart, so much anger, that she could barely contain it. Death and all his shadowed minions waited for her answer, and she could see him losing his patience.

"I'd rather die." She finally croaked out, leaning forward as far as she could.

Death's face did not change, but his eyes flashed in fury.

"That could certainly be arranged, Dorcas Meadowes," he whispered in his hideous, dry voice. "But there are some things we know you are not telling us. And you will tell us."

Dorcas remembered this part of training for the Order all too well, for she was hoped desperately that she'd never have to use it – but alas, here she was.

She retreated back into her mind, but kept her eyes open so they would think she'd be present for the torture. She retreated back into her memories, back to that night, and it was so vivid and clear – like she was living them once again. . . .

XXX

David Brave was her best and oldest friend, ever since they were children. He had always been adventurous, kind, funny – he'd always laugh the loudest, always win the last points in Quidditch games, he always included the younger children. He was two years older than her, more mature, more experienced. He was perfect in her eyes, looking like a Greek god, worthy of all the girls he endlessly wooed.

And, though she mercilessly wished she did not – she loved him. She'd always loved him, and all she was to him was a little sister.

But that one night in the beginning of fifth year, she decided to discreetly ask him if he felt anything more – in secret, like she did.

She should've known what was coming.

It was late that night, and almost everyone had gone up to bed – except David, of course, because he always stayed up later on Sunday nights to do the weekend homework he'd neglected to do at a more reasonable time. She slowly walked down the steps of the girls' dormitories and watched his concentrated face in the firelight for a moment before she cleared her throat.

He looked up and smiled. "Dorcas," he laughed, "What are you doing up?"

She took a deep breath and walked down to stand a good few feet away from him. She tucked her short blonde hair behind her ear and said, "There's actually something I wanted to ask you."

He frowned and nodded, writing another sentence to his essay. "Alright then, shoot." He said, and she could tell he was distracted, but she asked anyway.

"Would you ever date me?" she asked, and he snapped his head up to her. She hastily added, "Hypothetically, of course."

She wanted to slap herself. The whole point was this wasn't supposed to be hypothetical. She'd blown it already.

However, he visibly relaxed and furrowed his brow with a chuckle. "Why are you asking me this?"

"I just . . . want to know." She explained lamely.

"Dorcas, that's a ridiculous question." He said, shaking his head and laughing as he turned back to his essay.

She swallowed thickly. "So, no then?" she pressed, stepping forward.

He set his quill down and blinked at her confusedly with a furrowed brow. "What does it matter, Dorcas? Are you having insecurity issues or what?"

_If you only knew_, she thought dryly.

"Just answer." She whispered, looking at him hard.

He met her gaze without the force she put behind hers, and shrugged. "No, I suppose."

She froze, then swallowed hard. "No?" she choked out.

What had she been expecting? That he would suddenly realize she was right for him and pick her up and kiss her like they'd never see tomorrow?

No . . . what she'd been expecting had made the rejection worse. She only wanted a yes. Or a maybe. Just – not a flat out 'no'. It was more than she could take. It seemed like the obvious answer for him, she could see it in his innocent eyes. He didn't know just how much he'd hurt her with those three words. 'No, I suppose'.

And look where her even simplest wishes had gotten her. Her childish, stupid, naïve wishing. She was such a fool for believing that after all this time of steady friendship, he would have harbored some sort of romantic feelings toward her. He wasn't like her. He didn't hide his emotion, and it kept him in control; it kept him stable and on top and where he wanted to be.

But some people just weren't capable of such things. People like her.

"Dorcas?" he inquired, shaking her from her thoughts. He was gazing at her, concerned, and started to stand. "You understand, of course? You're certainly beautiful – you're like a sister to me, though."

Even his tiny, meaningless compliment didn't faze her. Of course she understood. They weren't meant to be together. Someone like David Brave just didn't end up with someone like her anyway. It just wasn't in the cards.

She stumbled back as he stepped closer, and felt her throat close up. "No, no, I'm fine, David. Just go back to your work." She said breathlessly, putting a hand on her chest.

"Dorcas . . . you're crying." He said, his eyebrows raising in surprise and confusion. He was so simple to read to her. Too bad it wasn't mutual, or he surely would've been more concerned.

She put a hand to her cheek and felt heavy tears streaming down her face. She cleared her throat and looked away, chuckling half-heartedly. "It's just this musty old castle, David, I'm . . . fine," she assured him, giving him a smile. Her familiar façade was coming back fast, and she could tell her smile had comforted him. "I'll be back in about an hour, alright? I have something I need to do." She lied pathetically.

She could tell he didn't believe her, but he nodded all the same, which was good enough for her. He stepped forward to hug her, but she turned and made for the portrait hole. She was about to open it when he called her name. She turned and cursed herself for feeling too hopeful. He had a determined look on his face, and she knew he'd put the pieces together. Finally, after all these years.

"Your Prince Charming's out there, Dorcas," he assured her, "But it's not me."

The words hit her like a shock wave and time seemed to slow down as a tear fell down her cheek. She stared at him in all his glory – his golden blonde hair that seemed to glow in the firelight and his beautiful hazel eyes that would never look at her in the way she looked at them.

She swallowed and opened her mouth, the words coming out of her mouth before she could stop them. "Are you saying that because you believe it's true or because you want to believe it's true?" she whispered.

His face cleared in shock, and she didn't wait for a response. She opened the portrait hole and fled the common room and the simple cruelty of it all.

She ran down the many staircases and tried to suppress the wretched sobs as long as she could. She sprinted down the suffocating corridors, the portraits and their irritated murmurs whizzing by. She ran in hopes of running her life away – that way, she wouldn't have to face David ever again. She wouldn't have to face her friends pitying looks and sickeningly comforting words when they undoubtedly figured out what happened. Hell, she wouldn't even have to put up with the Marauders again – that was a plus.

Finally, when the sobs finally got the best of her will, she stumbled into an empty corridor and slid down the wall, covering her mouth so the sobs wouldn't echo off the main hallway beside her for the rest of the school to hear. Oh, the gossip that would come about if she was discovered. 'Dorcas Meadowes was found crying over a boy last night – David Brave, at that! Guess she's not as tough as she seems . . . she's just a little girl . . .'

She squeezed her eyes shut as her chest tightened painfully and sobs wreaked her body once more. His face just wouldn't escape her mind.

And they would be right, of course. She shouldn't be crying over a boy. She knew the unforgiving nature of men ever since her father left her mum when she was only nine. She should've known, but she'd foolishly let it all get to her head. Well . . . not anymore.

David had given her the truth, and rightfully so. This wasn't his fault. It was hers for letting herself get carried away in her girlish fantasy.

She wiped her eyes and rubbed her nose on her sleeve, letting her head fall back against the cool stone wall with a sigh. In fact, she noticed now how cold she really was, and her crying had not helped. She wrapped her arms around her trembling body and decided to wait there a bit longer for fear of running into David in the common room. She flinched at the thought. She didn't know if she was ready for that just yet, even if she was willing to let her hopes with him go.

She groaned at the thought of tomorrow and banged her head against the wall again.

"Hello?" she heard someone whisper, nearly giving her a heart attack. It came from the main corridor a little ways off, and she knew that damn voice. Just what she needed – a Marauder on her hands. And Sirius Black, out of all of them.


	2. Stay With Me

"_Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."_

_-Robert A. Heinlein_

**Ch. 2 - Stay With Me**

"James, is that you? I've got the – bloody hell – " he hissed as he came around the corner with his wand lit. It fell on her and she rolled her eyes, sliding up the wall to a stand.

"Do I looked like James Potter to you?" she asked dryly.

He squinted at her. "Meadowes? What the bloody hell are you doin' down here?"

"It's none of your business, is it?" she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest. "Now, if you would kindly leave me in my corridor."

"It isn't your corridor." He scoffed indignantly.

She looked at him with narrowed eyes. "Sirius Black, you better get the hell out of my corridor, because I am just dying for someone to take my anger out on – and you just happen to be someone I'm willing to do that to."

He flashed her a lopsided smile, leaning clumsily on the wall with one arm. "Is this a sexual, passionate anger?"

She whipped out her wand and trained it on him. "It's an 'I'll-hex-your-balls-off-if-you-don't-leave-right-now' anger."

He raised his eyebrows and whistled slowly, dropping his arm from the wall. "Merlin, Meadowes, you really are feistier than normal. What's got your wand in a knot then?" he pressed, sitting down opposite her.

She kept her wand on him and gave him an incomprehensive look. "What part about me being so angry I will hex your balls off don't you understand?" she cried.

"The why you're so angry part," he said contentedly. "And you should probably keep your voice down, lest you want some prefect to find us – or worse, Minnie."

She shook her head with a furrowed brow. "_Minnie_?"

"McGonagall." He clarified.

She shook her head again and sighed, sitting. He obviously wasn't leaving and she supposed if anyone could distract her from her unfortunate situation, it was Sirius Black.

"So? What's wrong, Meadowes?" he asked expectantly, putting his forearms on his knees.

The dim light from his wand didn't make out too much detail, so she hoped he couldn't see the tears spring up in her eyes. She turned her head anyway and hastily wiped them away.

"Oh, buggar," she grumbled, then sighed. "I'd much rather be distracted from what's wrong with me, Black, if you don't mind."

He frowned indifferently and shrugged. "Alright then. Boys don't really want to hear girls whine after all."

She turned to him with her mouth hanging open, but then saw that mischievous smile of his and she shook her head, chuckling.

"Jerk," she muttered, smiling as she looked away. Then she looked back up at him quizzically. "What are you doing down here anyway?"

He smirked and shrugged, over-nonchalant. "Oh, nothing, nothing – just out for a stroll."

She raised one eyebrow. "I was under the impression that a Marauder is always up to no good."

"That is a true statement, yes," he said, then cocked his head to the side. "Doesn't mean I'm going to go and tell you, though. Top secret stuff here."

She raised both eyebrows then and her eyes caught the brown sack she didn't noticed he'd been carrying. Must be the 'top secret stuff'. She squinted at it, noticing the familiar rounds shapes of –

"What's in there? Apples?" she scoffed, laughing. "That's your top secret stash?"

Sirius scowled and pushed the bag behind him. "None of your business, Meadowes!" he said, but he was laughing despite himself.

When their laughter died down, there was an awkward moment of silence and she cleared her throat, shifting her feet.

"Well, suppose I better . . . go back to my room. . . ." she said, her voice weak.

Sirius frowned at her. "Yeah, sure. You sure you're alright, Meadowes? No Slytherin try something, right?"

She let out a mirthless laugh, struggling to a stand. "Hardly. This was sort of my fault."

"Gonna tell me what happened now?" he asked as he followed her out of the hallway.

"We have to be quiet." She whispered.

"Don't try to weasel your way out of it! I successfully distracted you for a . . . decent amount of time." He persisted.

She sighed and turned her head to him, and was startled when she had to look up to see his face. She shook her head to herself then shrugged to him. "I – I just," she stopped, then sighed. "Fine. _Fine_, but just know you're causing me terrible pain."

"Oh, please, Meadowes, I'm sure you've encountered more on the Quidditch field."

_Yeah, physically_, she muttered in her head_, Such a boy._

"Well," she sighed, "You know how David Brave and I are sort of best friends? . . ."

And she told him everything that happened that night, trying to hold back tears again. Her childhood fantasy – crushed. How much more depressing could she put it, really?

When she finished, Sirius let out a low whistle, shoving his hands in his pockets. She waited for him to say something, but he didn't. When she felt like she couldn't bear it anymore, felt like he was thinking how pathetic she was, she prodded, "_Well_?"

He glanced at her, frowning nonchalantly. "That's bloody awful." He admitted.

She waited. Then, "That's all? That's all you have to say?"

He sniffed. "Well, what do you want me to say?"

She let out a disbelieving laugh. "I don't know, something more than 'that's bloody awful'! I know it's bloody awful, Black, Merlin!"

Sirius looked at her quizzically and realized she was right. However, he wasn't the best at this kind of thing, comforting females – sometimes he was sure he'd just end up old and alone, because the creatures were so damn emotional. Although, if he was being honest, Dorcas Meadowes had a special place in his heart, and she didn't even know it. Hearing about all this with David bloody Brave irked him more than he was ready to admit, and the only way he wouldn't have to talk about it is shrug it off nonchalantly. At least, that was his plan until the woman started screeching at him.

"You want the truth?" he asked, and already knew he would very likely regret what he was going to say. Meadowes just had a knack of tearing his will apart.

"Yes, I would like that very much." She admitted testily.

"I think that you are so much _better_ than David Brave – and he does not deserve you." He murmured, looking at her with a small smile – looking and her and her beautifully smooth, pale skin, her small, elfin frame, and her dark eyes, a blue-green he could never get enough of.

She looked at him with such surprise that he couldn't help but laugh – whether it was at his own stupidity or hers for fancying such an awful bloke – didn't she know he picked on first years? – he didn't know, but she seemed to take it the wrong way.

"Oh, yes, very funny joke, Black!" she exclaimed, storming ahead of him. "You're such a git, you know that? Merlin, I actually believed you for a moment, so _stupid_. . . ." she prattled on, and it was his turn to be surprised.

"I wasn't _joking_, you crazy woman!" he scoffed, and she stopped a good distance away from him, turning around.

"What?" she called.

"I was _laughing_ because you had that stupid" _– and incredibly adorable_ – "dumbfounded look on your face, like you didn't believe me."

"Well, I don't." she admitted, putting her hand son her hips indignantly.

He rolled his eyes and caught up with her. "I meant what I said, Meadowes. It's just funny how you don't seem to believe me." He said, opening the portrait hole and waiting for her to go in first with a smirk.

She watched him with a slightly awed, slightly suspicious look, and continued to until she walked through the portrait hole. He followed her in, watching his feet, and when it closed, he lifted his head to find her whirl on him, much closer than either was prepared for. Nevertheless, she ranted on, her finger in his face.

"I'm onto you, Black," she warned, "I dunno what this charming, 'you're better than him' act is, but if you're just trying to get in my knickers, it won't work, you hear me? I have a strong will and all that, understand?"

Sirius held back shocked laughter and simply nodded, too surprised and amused to try and argue. She nodded firmly and pulled on the hem of her shirt crisply. "Well, um, now that that's settled – we're friends, yeah?"

She held her hand out to him and he glanced at it with a raised eyebrow. She nodded in encouragement.

He canted his head slowly and took her hand, chuckling slightly. "Yeah, Meadowes – we're friends."

She nodded and turned to go up the girls' dormitory steps, as he walked over to the boys. When he was halfway across the common room and she was halfway up the stairs, he called out her name.

She turned expectantly, and before he could stop himself, he grinned and said, "You're cute."

Dorcas watched Sirius go with wide eyes. He must've put her in speechless shock at least five times. He glanced back at her once more before he let out a short laugh, going up the boys' dormitory stairs two at a time.

Only after a moment did she note with great relief that David wasn't in the room, and she slumped against the wall.

Merlin. There was only so much boy drama a girl could take in one night . . . not that being with Sirius, or anything to do with Sirius, was boy trouble. Because she had no feelings for him. Strictly friends, like she said.

And with a self-assured nod, she climbed the rest of the stairs and collapsed on her bed for some much-needed sleep.


	3. Green Eyed Monster

_"Jealousy is not the enemy but only another way we learn. We learn who we are and not to judge. We learn that some people have more than we do. We can't always be who we strive to be."_

_Jillian Jenkins_

**Ch. 3 – Green Eyed Monster**

"Well, er, do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me?"

Dorcas just stood there frozen like an idiot, her mouth opening and closing. And really, what was she supposed to say? She didn't even know what she wanted – but she couldn't help feeling she was forgetting something important, something that had happened earlier that day, but she couldn't put her finger on it. . . .

A week went by, and she barely saw David. Her friends were comforting, of course. She got a lot of pitying stares from people, most of which she didn't know – and she didn't even want to know how they found out. Hopefully he wasn't going around boasting about it, but David wouldn't do such a thing anyway. Of course, it wasn't as bad as she thought, like most things turned out to be. Then again, she did have Sirius Black to fall back on.

She and Sirius had got on surprisingly well the past week, and they'd become good friends. She'd even befriended the rest of the Marauders, who also weren't as bad as she thought – but still pretty bad, mind you, she wasn't getting soft here – and they were bloody funny, too. She even got her best friend Lily to tolerate that James Potter, much to his delight. He owed her big time.

Which is why, for that upcoming Hogsmeade weekend, it came in handy – she needed a favor. Of course, she never really saw David the past week, because they were both avoiding each other, she presumed, but when she did, it was like a stab into her heart, because, bloody hell, she still loved the bloke. And she wanted to be with him, she did, more than anything else. He was her Prince Charming, she knew it – it just always takes the boys a little while longer to figure it out.

So, she was going to try the oldest trick in the book – she was going to try and make him jealous. So, that was when she filled James in on what he needed to do.

"Aw, Dorcas, what about Lily?" he whined in the common room.

She rolled her eyes. "James, you have a countless number of Hogsmeade weekends left to ask her. Just sacrifice this one for me, would you? I'm the one who got her to talk to you in the first place, remember?"

He pouted. "I hate it when you use that against me."

She smirked and shrugged. "So? Will you do it?"

He sighed and she jutted out her bottom lip and clasped her hand sin front of her, bouncing on her toes. "Please? Please? Please, please, please, please, please, please –"

"Okay, okay, alright, okay!" he said, talking over her and laughing slightly to himself. "But we're _even_ after this, deal?"

She grinned. "Deal. And don't tell anyone, James!"

Word spread quickly that "dear Merlin, did you hear? James Potter's taking Dorcas Meadowes to Hogsmeade? I suppose it was going to happen eventually, I mean all those Quidditch practices together" and it caused more of a whirlwind of gossip than Dorcas was used to being a part of. James took it with his usual self-confident grace, and, actually, she had to give it to him, he was a fantastic actor. Must be all the years of faking innocence when it came to pranks – not that he needed it anymore, since everyone knew it was him and the rest of the Marauders.

Something that did surprise James, though, was the looks he was getting form his best mate. Sirius seemed to be very put out by this arrangement, and he'd tell him what was really going on, but he'd promised Dorcas, and frankly, he was afraid of the woman's fury. So he'd just go with it for now. But he did intend on finding out what all that pouting was about. . . .

"Oi, Padfoot!" James called as they all filed into the main corridor after breakfast. Sirius turned with a glower and James raised his eyebrows. "What the bloody hell's wrong with you?"

"I just – Dorcas, James? I thought she was like your sister." He grumbled.

"Well, she is, I just thought that we could try it out –"

"I mean, she's not even that pretty," he pointed out, and James raised both his eyebrows now. "And she – she has weird eyebrows."

James suddenly was hit by the obvious truth, and he started laughing incredulously. "Padfoot – you _fancy_ her! Don't you?"

"_No_!" he scoffed, a tad too loud, "Psh, that's ridiculous."

James gave him a knowing look until Sirius finally couldn't take it anymore. "Okay, fine!" he hissed, "But don't go babbling about it, Prongs, I mean it."

"Why didn't you tell me before?" he chuckled as they started walking down the hall.

"It's not a big deal, James, alright?" he muttered, looking around to make sure the lady in speaking wasn't around. "Just – don't tell her."

"Sirius, I promised I wouldn't tell Dorcas, but – we're not really going out. It's only to make that bastard Brave jealous."

Sirius scowled. "Why does she fancy him?" he exclaimed, "Merlin, I swear, I don't understand women somethi –"

"Hey, guys!"

Dorcas seemed to appear out of nowhere and both staggered backwards, strangled yelps coming out of their mouths. She looked at them in surprise, laughing.

"What the blood hell's the matter with you?" she chuckled.

The two boys looked at each other, found they'd grabbed each other's arms in panic, and quickly dropped them.

"Oh, nothing. Just talking of tonight's Quidditch practice. Listen, I thought that we'd put Krispsky as Keeper this year, he's grown a bloody eight inches or something like that and you and Sirius can stay the Beaters . . . ."

And things were back to normal for now. Sirius let out a slow sigh of relief and James sent him a self-satisfied wink, to which Sirius rolled his eyes. Bloody prick.

**XXX**

Dorcas walked back to the Gryffindor common room after her last class with Sirius, groaning about the essay Professor Binns had assigned and laughing at his lame impression of the boring ghost.

"_Write this essay until your hand falls off or you die of boredom, you childish lot of_ –"

"Dorcas?"

The two of them turned, their laughing dying down, to see David standing there, looking like a Greek god, as usual.

"Can I talk to you for a moment?" he asked, looking at her so deeply that she turned her head away and looked at Sirius. She'd meet him back in the common rom in a bit, she told him. He gave her a wary look, but Dorcas nodded in encouragement, and, he leaned forward, whispering in her ear, "Play hard to get, Meadowes, for Merlin's sake."

And with one last glower at David, the two were left alone. She looked back up at him.

"I heard you were going to Hogsmeade this weekend with James Potter." He stated.

"Yeah, it seems everyone has." She replied, studying him curiously. Surely her plan hadn't actually worked?

"Dorcas, I don't want you to go with him." He said hurriedly.

"What?" she gasped.

"I – I've been thinking about what you said. About what I said. And I think . . ." _Here it comes, he's about to say it, what I've been waiting for all these years –_ "And – and what are you doing hanging around Sirius Black, anyway? He's bad news, Dorcas."

She was so stunned, it took her a while to process the words. He'd obviously changed his mind halfway through his sentence, leaving her feeling defeated and weary.

"What?" she repeated dumbly, in a barely audible voice.

"Well, er, do you want to go Hogsmeade with me?"

She stood there for a moment, words escaping her, until she heard Sirius' voice ring through her head – _"Play hard to get, Meadowes, for Merlin's sake."_

"What are you on about, David?" she asked with squinted eyes. "Listen – and no offence, David, I love you – but you have no right telling me who I can and cannot hang around with. And Sirius is a nice guy; I don't know where this sudden protectiveness is coming from."

But she did. She'd actually succeeded, even if he didn't realize it (or didn't want to admit it) – she'd made him jealous.

When he didn't say anything, just frowned at the ground, she sighed, starting to walk backwards. "Well, Sirius and the others are waiting for in the common room, so I'll see you around, yeah? You're still my best friend." She said, and hoped he couldn't hear how forced it sounded to her.

"Yeah . . . best friends . . ." he repeated in a mumble, but Dorcas was already gone.

Only one thing was on David Brave's mind at that moment – he wanted to be more than friends with Dorcas Meadowes. And if he couldn't have that, no one else could. He learned at a very young age he always got what he wanted, always portrayed how he wanted to come off perfectly. Dorcas thought he was the perfect, goody-two-shoes golden boy, just like he wanted her to think. But he knew Potter and Black knew the other side to him, and he couldn't have her knowing all that.

Something had to be done, and quickly.


End file.
